Keep The Passion Ignited


If there’s one thing any relationship can easily lose track of, it’s the passion. Life, the responsibilities, and well basically all the other serious stuff the world throws at you can get you so distracted from your own personal life. No matter how great and passionate a relationship can be, many people let the distractions take over. It is a chain reaction that everyone needs to learn how to break for the sake of their love life.

Just because the passion is there, it doesn’t mean it’s OK to put your relationship on autopilot. There is always work that needs to be done to prevent the need to constantly reignite flames.

Let’s say you have an amazing relationship where the both of you just really click. It’s fun, easy going, effortless, and sexy. You build this strong foundation and you start to have your unique way of doing things together. Naturally, you also start to develop a nice routine with each other.

Time flies by during this amazing relationship, as does everything else when you’re having fun. Time also flies pretty fast when you throw in the routine motions of the other things in your lives. There’s your work/career. On top of that, you have your social life and responsibilities, like bills and errands that can be a huge distraction. These distractions build up and are what can cause the passion to dwindle away due to where couples start to prioritize their emotions.

When couples have this routine, get comfortable, and have the distractions, it leads to the relationship being in danger of getting stale. Sometimes it gets to a point where you’re convincing yourself it’s OK because you’re both “busy” and the relationship is just “fine.” You see how this domino effect is just forming? In my opinion, if the lovers out there made a conscious effort to prevent this, more relationships would survive.

Sadly, even couples that are perfect for each other with no real issues fail due to the distractions and neglect on their own relationship. Fortunately, there are very simple things you can do to keep that passion sparked up.


Keep work and the outside problems on the outside

You see the picture above? Do you really want to bring the Grim Reaper of love home with you to shaft any chance of a good evening? With a busy life comes negativity, bad days, and outside stress. Keep the negativity out unless it has to do with your love life. Don’t let it be the pollution to your happy home. You don’t want that kind of negative energy coming into the home to ruin the mood of what is supposed to be your escape from that world. Imagine hearing about someone’s bad day right away as they also incorporate the negativity with everything. How sexy is that going to make anyone feel? I used to talk about losing a sale or having a terrible appointment with clients and realized I needed to just stop. The supportive woman my wife is always listened, but she always was brought down with me.

Yes, there will be times when you’re going to want to talk to your other half about things like that for advice and guidance. Just remember that there’s a difference between talking about it and letting it ruin everything else in your world.


Be spontaneous with your intimacy

Your intimacy doesn’t have to be plain vanilla and black and white. Make it exciting and change it up. Don’t make it a habit to only be in the mood like clockwork on a certain day, at a certain time, during a certain setting. The stars shouldn’t have to be aligned for it to be a perfect moment to be intimate. It’s sometimes fun and exciting when it’s not planned or organized.

I love the scene in Pretty Woman where Richard Gere wanted Julia Roberts right then and there on top of the piano. They didn’t even care at that moment if anyone was watching. They felt something right then and there and acted on it. When it comes to passion, sometimes you just have to live in the moment without overthinking.

On this same subject, if you notice your significant other looking sexy, don’t pass up the opportunity to flatter them and let it be known how you feel about how they look at that given moment. Express yourself with a look, some passionate words, or even some nice actions.


Surprise each other with romantic themed dates at home

Why home and not out somewhere extravagant? Because it doesn’t always have to be about wining and dining plus home is your comfort zone where the both of you can be yourselves. I also don’t mean dinner and a movie at home. I mean a romantic fully prepped dinner with the intention of real quality time. No TV should be on so you both get stuck on a favorite show or movie. You always want to avoid ways to lose eye contact. Play some music instead. Set up some candles in the bedroom so that after dinner has settled, you can make your way to where you’re most comfortable – the bedroom.


Dress and feel sexy for them

I know this is so much easier for the ladies to do, but us men can still participate. Ladies, I know you have your “kill em” outfits in reserves for special occasions! Put it on for your man and make them see your sexy side. Fellas, if you have a pair of favorite boxers your girl bought for you or a nice tank top your girl loves that you wear, put that on.

When going through the normal everyday routines, you start to get used to the work clothes, the hair up in a bun, and the “being comfortable” mode causing you to forget that sexy sassy side of your lover. Awaken the sexy side and bring that out of each other.

Do something special just because

There doesn’t always have to be a special occasion for you to do something nice. You want to always be alert for ways to make them feel special. Trust me when I say this that the little things never go unnoticed and will always be kept in mind. You will more than likely get “rewarded” naturally because of how special they feel.

As I said before, just because the passion is there and established, it doesn’t make it ok for any relationship to be on autopilot. Put the effort in to make them sparks fly and try to prevent the need to reignite the flame as much as possible. If it needs to be done too often, things will eventually go stale and become too routine making it harder to spark up.

This can be different for different people at different stages of their life, but this can be applied whether your relationship is fresh or if it’s had some time put in. Sadly, there are couples out there that just realize that they are not right for each other regardless of how much passion they do or don’t have.

What other ways do you keep the passion alive? I want a growing list of ideas from you romantics out there.

photo credit: R. Motti via photopin cc

photo credit: MizzD via photopin cc

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